05042012

Hii everyone,Finally it's time to revive my dying blog..

Anyways, back to less depressing stuff, remember I kept saying i'm just stuck at home

watching dramas online the whole week after quite my job. Seriously this is the reason i DONT enjoy watching a drama that hasn't completely aired yet. I hate having to wait for a whole week for

the new episodes to come out :( I like to just watch it one shot, like marathon, continuously!

But having said that, I just can't get enough of this new Hong Kong drama that I'm absolutely obsessed.

URGGG...
Finally started on my diet yesterday night.

Kinda late, but, better late than never...Reality hit me when my friend told me

I was getting fat! and also when I stood on the scales :( I only had apples for dinner

and yoghurt for supper. Seriously sooo UNsatisfying, but when I woke up this morning

to a flatter stomach, I felt happy. hahaha. I really can't be bothered going to the yoga :(

I'm just so lazy to go to the yoga, to sweat it all out. So I'd just take the easy way out and

starve!!! HAHA just kidding. I'm still eating healthy, just a lot less. Like cutting out all those

late night suppers, McDonalds and all those salty fried foods. Gonna go all healthy

and bland before i go KL :( Torture and Sufferings, here i come...

Bye ~ ~ ~

.....

If words can just put my feelings into sentences now. Their scattered all over the place.

Sometime I hate growing up. I really hate having to think of what my future would be. Its blur and I can't predict nuts. I don't have a plan but I know I wanna go far. I am just like a lost kid. I saw this coming but had never expected it to come so fast. I finally had the time to sit down and have a good time alone to think what I have to to do in the next few months.

Orite, to come up with a plan is never easy. Simply because I hate that miserable feeling if things doesn't go the way it was initially planned. LOL.

Is time to get serious. Many times I am dying inside actually.

Guess there's no easy way to say goodbye.

Sorry I L Y

IMY

WISH YOU WERE HERE :(

left behind

Choesong hamnida < i'm sorry in korean*

How's your life? I bet it's great. Good~~
Feel like blogging at this hour.I know, I know, you haven’t seen an update posted from me about several months ago but that is because I have been busy with my work. I'm very very sorry.So well,now i am trying to smile show my peace sign here. :)

There is one thing that people never fails to ask me, it has to be this one million dollar stupid question!!!
That is not a question worth to be asked also!! I mean it had already came to a point where I gave up answering. I don't know how to answer this question clearly because I am not the Almighty God. I am so sick of being thrown the same question and the funny thing is.. THE SAME PERSON ALWAYS ASKS THE SAME QUESTION RAWRRRRRRRR!!

And my #foreveralone has gone to a whole new level. Totally skipped Level 99 to Level 100 when my friends are either changing boyfriends or just got into a new relationship. No I am not complaining just yet because I understand and I am putting myself into their shoes.

But ish okehh. Short term sadness!

The past decade

Yay today is November 1st! I honestly think it's crazy how fast time flies by! I think Ferris Bueller was right when he states, "Life moves pretty fast. If you don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it." That's so true; life does move pretty fast and I already feel like I am missing certain occasions and opportunities. What are we waiting for? An invitation to start living. Nope, not anymore.

I spent the whole day, looking through pictures that I've taken from 14-18 and reading through all the old blog entries. The only two things that came into my mind is :" WTH am i thinking back then dressing like this and i thought it was cool?" and it's just plain mortifying . I would say I've been through alot, been through what a normal teen had gone through i guess? I was innocent and emo most of the time (dont bother digging for my old blog, I've private it). Y'know back then, I thought being out casted and being heartbroken is the end of the world? I even attempted wrist cutting myself (which is so so so dumb).I'm not sure if this is the "usual" teen issues,but these I've been in a dark side for about 2-3 years.

Why yes, I'm a victim of teen bully. I am not popular back then. I was fat, ugly and obnoxious. Have you ever had a bunch of girls coming up to you just to taunt you and said the reason for them to hate you because they don't like the way you look? They can come up with ANY excuses just to make fun of you. Then they'll started scolding you all sorts of vulgarities from the Lian-Bengs Dictionary. I remembered once, there's this senior who ran behind me and started calling me names like " pig trotter", " pui ba(means fat meat in Hokkien)" and all sorts of name. It was hurtful and mean yet I had to give the poker face showing i don't care and i am not bothered.

I tried okay, I tried to hard to be accepted and i still wasn't.I failed in maintaining friendships outside school and the people in my school still hated me. I gave up trying and that's when I started to shut the true self up in a dark closet of shame where i blamed myself for everything happened AND the amount of negativity in me is just unhealthy. Do you know how tough it is to give that poker face throughout the years of my secondary school life? Everything about it just reminds me of something bad, mean and hurtful. Not only girls, even the guys makes fun of me.

Thankfully i had my super awesome BFF and classmates like G to help me through the "darkest" moment of my life so far. BFF & I had been each other pillars since primary school and i think i will die without having her in my life for the past decade..

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Here is the song , enjoy~

absolutely amazing! great work Christina!! I smurf you..:)

Lazy blogger on board.

How's your life? I bet it's great. But it's not great for me. I had a terrible backache, sore throat, cough and cold. Sucks right? I know. I've been in pain for months regarding my backache. Lack of exercise? Yeah that's one reason. But now, it'd worsen. So now even if I exercise alot, like yoga there's still a little percentages of chances for recovering. So, in order to stay healthy, I'll have to exercise daily, go for weekly checkups & acupuncture, eat a healthy diet. I won't be eating those rubbish foods such as fried chicken etc. One thing is because they're oily. But overall, they're just gonna harm our health. Yeah I know, it's easy just by saying, but it's hard doing it..teehee..

I just had lunch and I'm already feeling sleepy. Alone at home like kids with my homeworks.. Life have been.. I wouldn't say hectic but its just really tiring. I don't even have the mood to attend any classes even my most favouriterest subject on planet earth! Lazy bum I am but I can't help it :(

And nothing seems to be going my way! I am currently undergoing some stress shit.. Not that I'm worried anymore but when the things comes to my mind urghhh my mood totally goes down the drain and the only thing that makes me feel better is to sleep.. I'm already trying my very best to hide my emotions and hopefully things will be back in one piece very soon. :)))))

Hello peoples! Finally got some lil time to blog before I get busy again.

Ooppss just ignore my messy beautiful hair . LOL

Hell yeah ~~~

H-A-L-L-O-W-E-E-N!!!!!!Come on down dressed up as scarily/freakily/ugly/pretty as possible and take on a whole new character other than yourself. Be someone else for a night :D I'll be there next week, wanna know what I'm dressing up as?? Head on down to RH and find me! XD I'm soooo excited!! My first time celebrating HALLOWEEN! can't wait can't wait!